Redundancy is like a bereavement
It will probably be more of a loss than you realise
So it’s happened to you too. You’re sitting there jobless; your career in tatters.
Even though the rational side of you is probably saying, things will be ok, the emotional side may well kick in and cause a load of anxiety. You may well think that you’re rid of that awful job; and the people you didn’t like. But, I would bet that at some point you will feel a sense of loss.
Having been in the position to have to make people redundant, and having been made redundant myself, I’ve seen both sides of the coin. Let me tell you, having to make a team member redundant or being made redundant feels horrible; whichever side of the table you’re sitting on.
Having to make people redundant; I felt terrible and highly stressed. I didn’t sleep properly at night for worrying about what would happen to the people who had put their faith in me and the company. I felt sick having to follow the legal HR rules and company line. It seemed so impersonal and cold.
From my personal experience of having been made redundant, I initially felt confident, as I walked away from the company that no longer needed/wanted me. I would get another job easily. Suffice to say, it didn’t work like that for me.
After a while, the euphoria of getting the redundancy payout wore off. I realised I wasn’t needed. I had nothing to get up for in the morning. I found that I missed my job, my colleagues, and yes, even the commute.
When you’ve been ‘in work’ for umpteen years, it becomes a habit. It’s what you do — part of your ‘usual’ day to day life.
Having talked with many people who have been through redundancy, I’ve found that everyone takes it differently. Though most will go though a period of ‘mourning’. At a minimum level, it’s the loss of the ‘usual’. For others, it hits much deeper.
After being made redundant, some people get very low, even to the point of committing suicide.
If you know someone is struggling to cope; reach out and offer a friendly ear. Too many good people take their lives when they feel all is lost. There are many support groups and professionals that can help. One good source of positive inspiration is the book ‘Suicide to Success’ by Rob Goddard.
So what can you do?
Over and above looking for a new job, or starting your own business. You can choose to confront the loss head-on; as eventually I did. For me it was about 6 months after I was made redundant. That was when I was personally ready to deal with it. Up till then I had been in denial, a common response.
Everyone will have their own time frames and ways of dealing with the loss. For me, by facing up to it and setting new life goals and aspirations, I then had a positive way forward. It was when I realised that my world hadn’t just fallen apart. Part of the whole gambit is dealinhg with the the embarrasment of having to let friends and family know you are redundant — It seems like a stigma.
A key learning for me was; get right on proactively looking for that new source of income. It’s all too easy to sit and think the world owes you a living. By doing something positive, it keeps you occupied and moving forward.
It can seem hard to re-start your career. Especially for those heading towards middle age. It can seem daunting to have to go back down all the ladders you’ve worked hard to climb over the years. Leave your ego at the door and just get going. It’s a great opportunity to do something even better.
…and remember — Be gentle with yourself. It wasn’t your fault!
